Archive for January 2016
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…. a thought from Chris Shea:
My goal, and the mission of “Lifesjourney”, is to guide us toward finding self-awareness and inner peace. I encourage us to view our lives from varied perspectives trying to find what daily practices strengthen us along our journey.
Lifesjourney’s philosophy for finding inner peace lies in two basic concepts: keeping our thoughts on the present moment, and practicing some form of daily meditation.
“Mindfulness” is a word I often use in my writings, on my social media, and a concept I use with my clients. One of the pioneers in the mindfulness movement, Jon Kabat-Zinn, defines mindfulness as:
“a means of paying attention in a particular way; on purpose, in the present moment, and nonjudgmentally.”
Personally, the two key phrases in this definition which I feel are important are “on purpose” and “nonjudgmentally”. To find our inner-peace we need to consciously make the choice to spend time every day focusing our attention on what is happening around us and within us. Our focus is not meant to judge what is happening, just to notice it. As we become aware of our surroundings and our inner self, we will become aware of life’s joys and potential. In our state of focused awareness, we are enabled to see solutions; to see hope. 
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“Life is sometimes difficult, but even so, it is always possible to find inner-peace. I talk about topics of daily life which cause us stress and anxiety, guiding us on how to change our perspective and to learn how to live in the moment.” -Chris Shea, host of “On Finding Peace”
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Rest Stop (Saturday) … coping with the Blizzard 2016
Winter Scene (Credit: unknown)
As I write this I, like millions of other people along the NE coast of the US, have hunkered down in the house due to the blizzard occurring. As of this moment it is still snowing and I already have two feet of snow on the ground.
Personally, I love snow. This event is a joy for me, and I am like a kid again. I see the beauty in the snow, it’s uniqueness, the sights, sounds, and smell in the air. All of this is perfect for me! Yet, I do realize that my love of this weather is not shared by everyone. There are many people who despise this weather, and, there are those who have been panicking for days before the start of this storm.
I am not in any way judging anyone, since each us views life from our own perspective, and that perspective is our reality. So, although I was not panicking over this storm, those that were truly felt fear. Panic is defined as: “a sudden overwhelming fear, with or without cause, that produces hysterical or irrational behavior, and that often spreads quickly through a group of persons.” (Panic at Dictionary.com. 2006. 24 Jan. 2016. http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/panic) One of the reasons we panic is because we allow ourselves to “live” in the future where we have no control over the events. That realization of our lack of control brings on our panic.
Living in the moment is when we will feel at peace, but living in the moment is not always easy to do. In this short video I talk about ways we can change our perception to therefore change our reality to find peace.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kfMN_UXaBiQ]
Share with us your ways of coping with events which otherwise would worry or panic you.
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Rest Stop (Monday) … celebrating peace & unity
Today, in the USA, we remember and celebrate the pastor and civil rights activist, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. In honor of Dr. King and all he stood for, I created this collage of three of his quotes for us to reflect.
I believe that Dr. King’s message is universal, and a call to action for us to live each day in love and justice.
How can each of us live his statements in a concrete way?
Share with us your thoughts.
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Rest Stop (Saturday) … post holiday blues
Do you hear that sound? What sound, you ask? The sound of calm after the holidays. The moment when we realize the guests have left and the errands are complete. The moment when we finally look around and notice all we have missed while immersed in the hustle and bustle of preparing for the holiday.
Personally, the days immediately following New Years Day are mixed emotion days for me. The first couple weeks of January I relax in the glow of Christmas and the expectation of new beginnings. Yet, intermingled amidst my joyous feelings there is a feeling of sadness as I realize that the holiday season has ended as “normal” life returns. Since the time when I was a young child I have loved the period from Halloween to New Years because of the festivities, the traditions, the foods, smells, sights, etc. Yet it seems that as soon as Halloween is upon us, in a flash, we are past New Years Day! As I sit writing this post I wonder where it all went. I think back to the preparations, excitement, anticipation, expectation, then the joy of Christmas’ arrival … now what? As I sit here and reflect I wonder what’s left? How did this season get away from me so quickly?
I don’t believe that I am alone in my emotions, nor do I need to be a counselor to understand the rationale for why many of us feel down after the holidays. Here are some actions I do for myself to cope with my feelings this time of the year. I hope they will help you, too:
- Spend a moment each day closing your eyes, slowing your breath, and focus on your feelings. Whatever you are feeling, feel it, reflecting on the origin of the feeling.
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If you find yourself experiencing the holiday blues, don’t hide those feelings nor ignore them. Acknowledge them to yourself and others. Many people are feeling the same way.
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Recall the parties, family gatherings, people you met, family members with whom you reconnected. Recall the memories, not in a perspective of “it’s over”, but in the perspective that it happened. How did those encounters affect you or change you? What can you take away from these encounters? Might you have made new friendships? Connect with the new friend. Did you meet distant family members? Develop a plan to stay in touch in a meaningful way.
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Recall your fondest and favorite memories of this holiday season. How do those memories make you feel? Take that feeling and find a way to make the feeling last into the new year.
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Make a conscious effort to find a way to make Christmas, its spirit and meaning, last into the new year. If we can do that then there is no longer a need for the holiday blues since the holiday will never truly end.
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Rest Stop (Epiphany) … flexible expectations
Today the Christian world celebrates the Epiphany; the commemoration of the moment when the three kings, or wise men, arrived at the birthplace of Jesus. They had journeyed far and long, following a star in the sky. Why did they embark upon this journey? They noticed something different and new in the sky; sensing its importance, they chose to follow it. They interpreted this sign in the sky to be significant and a sign of the arrival of a powerful person, a king. I have no doubt that although wearied by the journey, they were excited by the anticipation of their findings.
When they arrived at their destination they found the powerful person whom they were seeking, in a barn! Talk about blown expectations. Their journey of significance; their journey of anticipation at finding a powerful king on his throne, led them instead to a barn and a baby lying in a manger. A manger, its prior and intended use, from which the lowly and dirty animals ate. They found a defenseless baby laying in an animals’ food bowl. Talk about a let down.
Along our life’s journey, when our anticipated expectations don’t live up to reality, how do we react? What did these wise men do? According to the story, they not only stayed, but they knelt in homage to the baby in the food trough.
These wise men were able to recognize that although their expectations of finding a powerful man on a throne was a baby lying in a feeding trough, nonetheless they were able to recognize that their journey still had meaning. They were flexible with their expectations, understanding, through wisdom, that just because what they encountered did not match their expectation, it didn’t mean that the reason for the journey itself was flawed or wrong. The journey was true; the expectation is what needed to change. These wise men, after paying homage to the special baby, returned to their homeland by a different route; a new path. In a truly symbolic way, these wise men were so changed by their experience, that their “old path” no longer would lead them home. They now took a new way, and new approach, a new path, to find their way to their home.
How often do we feel disappointment at our journey’s end and thus respond by turning around and going home? What if the wise men did the same? They were able to “see” beyond their own expectations and were thus open to a new way of perceiving the world around them. The wise men didn’t act upon what they previously thought, nor upon their previous expectations. Rather, they saw more deeply the true reality before them. It is in that shift in perceiving and thinking which allowed them to see what was really present, and to be changed by the experience, not changed by their expectations.
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Calendar of Events
If you wish to book Chris for a conference, seminar or training, email our office: booking@lifesjourneyblog.com or call: 301-850-2177
Upcoming Scheduled Events
— October 4 @ 8:00pm EDT: Live talk with myself and my guest, Ben Rolnik. Topic: “Can Suffering Cease to Exist? Here’s How”. Click here: https://goo.gl/Yl6pUF
— October 7-11, 2016: I’m attending the NAADAC annual conference in Minneapolis, MN. Details click here
— October 16 @ 8:00pm EDT: Live talk with myself and co-host, Lisa DeLay. Topic: “Practical Strategies for Coping With Anxiety”. Click here: https://goo.gl/BjI45K
Rest Stop … New Year 2016 is here!
Marvin New Year’s comic strip 2014
Happy New Year 2016!! As I reflect on writing this post I realize that this time last week I gathered with family and friends to enjoy Christmas Day, while just last night I joined with family and friends watching the Times Square ball descend into a new year. A lot seems to happen in a short time during the holiday season. But what does it all mean? As I relax with a good cup of coffee on this first morning of the new year, I reread this Marvin comic I came upon a couple of years ago as I feel it’s still perfect for today! When you think about it, what makes this morning any different from yesterday’s morning? It feels the same; I’m doing the same things, the people around me are the same, the scenery is the same, and yes, the smell is the same. But I am told it is the start of a new year! New beginnings from old. New opportunities and adventures! Ahhhh….. the promise of new. But it doesn’t feel new. Does it feel or smell new to you? What is different today from yesterday? So, if this new year still “smells” like last year should I feel cheated out of that new car smell experience?
One of the reasons for this comic’s relevance is that many of us place too high of expectations on ourselves, especially this time of the year. I am not saying that this is not a fine time for resolutions. Of course it is! But are your resolutions and expectations reasonable? Challenging oneself can be a growth opportunity since through challenges, struggles, ups and downs, your goal may be achieved! Go for it! But what if you found yourself wanting more once you realized the new year didn’t smell any different from the old? What if you realize nothing has changed? For too many of us this is what happens along our journey. We expected a particular day to be one way, and when it wasn’t we were disappointed. But was your expectation realistic?
In a few days (January 6) I will be recalling the moment when the wise men arrived at the end of their journey searching for the newborn king, the Son of God, Jesus Christ. As with the wise men, when we journey toward our God, toward inner-peace, we can’t help but be changed. When we truly seek to find greatness, we can’t help but to be changed by the greatness we sought. How often do we feel disappointment at our journey’s end and respond by turning around and going home? What if the wise men did the same? They went beyond their own expectations and were open to a new way of looking at things. They didn’t act upon what they thought, rather, they looked more deeply at the situation and recognized that their expectations were not correct. Yes, it was a mighty king they found, but not how they imaged Him. Yet that didn’t matter. They learned to look at situations differently, not just from their own perspective It is that shift in perceiving and thinking which allowed them to understand the present moment, and to be changed by the experience.
In this new year, when our experiences don’t smell as they “should” (according to how I feel they should smell), try to take a moment and look at your situation, the new year, and find the deeper reality. Look beyond yourself to other possibilities. Challenge yourself to learn something new about this world around us. And in so doing, I have no doubt that your life’s journey will begin to take a new path.
May you all have a happy and blessed New year, filled with many new paths, adventures, and even new smells.
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